Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Dr. Jekyll or Mrs. Hyde?

So I was diagnosed with adult A.D.D. a few years back... I know SHOCKING, but true. I figured I had lived with it this long and hadn't taken meds all would just keep moving along like it always had. I thought back to my youth and came to the conclusion that the reason I was a bit of a mess in HS and college was because of my A.D.D. Back then society did not label everything like it does now and how if you have this(A.D.D.) you get a free ticket to so much! I read a lot about what to do for A.D.D. and what meds might help. I figured I would try them out. I went to the doctor and she gave me "STRATTERA". She said it would also help with my anxiety and crowd issues. Great! This was going to be a miracle in a bottle! Finally! Down the hatch they went. Oh boy, when was I going to feel like the perfect mom, wife, daughter, friend? One week, one month?

Needless to say, after about a month I wanted to take out my family and lock myself away. I had a hard time just getting through the day. It would take so much for me to be pleasant to people when they would come in to the Main Office. Then the smallest thing at home would set me off. I felt like I was Bi-Polar. My kids and Kurt would just look at me frightened. Kurt said to me "you are NOT the person I married". I was so upset that I freaked out my family and that this was not the super pill I thought it was going to be.
I have stopped taking them and waiting for it to get out of my system, which will take up to three weeks. I will just have to stop and think a bit more, filter my thoughts, and remember to write things down so I don't get totally overwhelmed. Oh, if I am telling you a story, it might take me a bit longer and even longer if there are distractions...

I will be on a quest for a natural way to take care of my "condition", but until then... Hey did you hear about our new kittens, oh and that I love my car, I miss Halee, what time is Kurt's game this week, I am at work till 10:00, do the kids have lunch money? You get what I mean:)


Saturday, September 5, 2009

Stars were Aligned...

Football starts early in our house, well I am not sure it ever stops, but Aug 13th was the beginning of Kurt's football season. Double session, coaches meetings, weightlifting, scouting Pop Warner, computer work, e mails, and the list goes on. Summer decided to arrive during double session, the 3 H's, hazy, hot , and humid! I would go and watch these young men sweat it out and occasionally lose their lunch.. This is the first year the school has had seniors and were playing with a full squad. So much work and time has been put in to getting things up and running.

Last night was the first game of the 2009/2010 season. All the papers and stats were predicting that the other team would win 46-7. That got Kurt FIRED UP! The last 2 practices he would come home all pumped up about how well the boys were "jelling" and really getting it.

Game night...

I have never seen so many people at a high school football game. Living on the East Coast it is not part of our culture like it is down south. If I were a transplant from the south last night I would of felt right at home! Over 3000 people showed up to our school. Parking was a nightmare but it was all worth it. The feeling in the stands and on the field was electrifying! I usually can't watch the games in the stands because of the comments people say about the coaching decisions. Most people do not make the connection that Kurt and I are married. I figured I needed to just suck it up and sit in the stands. I had so much fun! It was a beautiful fall night, full moon, band playing, cheerleaders doing their thing and the smell of the grill from the concession stand. I arrived a bit later and the score was 7 - 6 just before half, we were in the lead... I have been down this road before and just held my breath.

Play after play we marched it down the field, some mistakes along the way but all in all things were in our favor... Um, is this a dream? We got another TD... What is going on? I was floored. Everyone is watching the players reaction, I am watching Kurt. Now Kurt has this thing with BIG LEAGUE CHEW, I think he put the whole package in his mouth before the game. You can see him chomping on his gum feverishly. His jaw gets a mega work out. I watch him interact with the refs holding my breath when they have made a call that is controversial. It is almost more fun watching him then the game itself. A few times during the game I saw the head set he wears come flying off and then he quickly heads in the refs direction. Kurt being Kurt, just puts his hand on the shoulder of the ref and has a chat... Not sure what is said, but I get a bit nervous.

Time is ticking down, back and forth, it is our ball again. What? Another TD and we make the field goal. Seriously, this could not be written any better for us! The clock is counting down and the crowd is in awe! This was not supposed to happen. Sophia turns to me and says; "I guess that visualization thing dad does really works..."

Final score 20-6!!!

I just sat in the stands as the crowd dispersed. I had happy tears welling up inside. I am not sure many of you know the hard work and time it takes to be a coach, a football coach. I sat there watching the young men celebrate and Kurt talk to the team. The cameras were flashing all around and the press already hit the field. It was about a half hour before I could get to Kurt.
I was so proud of him, his coaching staff, and the boys. What a feeling!

I look forward to many more nights sitting in the stands with the crowds and hope that the stars are aligned with us again.

***Pictures coming soon or go to www.bedfordphotos.com

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