One of my greatest fears and that causes me so much anxiety is the call that something has happened to my parents. Now, I am not panicked about losing them because I have a strong belief in the eternal plan and that we will be together again.
My fear is the "stuff".
With living in California it isn't like I can just help the process now as they live 3500 miles from us. I know there is a lot of family history that goes way back with furniture, glass wear, art work, tools, and shelves and shelves of books of family genealogy. When I go home to visit I feel overwhelmed and have to cut my visits short because I can see my future of cleaning out and not being able to let go of items because I know the stories behind the "stuff".
I had a very difficult time cleaning out my own house when we moved from NH to CA. I cried over a Sharpie, yes a black everyday Sharpie. As time went on I got in the groove and dropped off my "stuff" at Goodwill over 13 car loads and 15 carloads to the dump. I met people in parking lots all over southern NH selling the valuable items.
I know my parents have items that are worth way more than I ever had. I can't just donate or throw away majority of it. Many of our dinners growing up we would go over pictures on the wall of who was who and also stories of the art and furniture that family members had created. They were ingrained in me. At the time I didn't really have an interest, but as I am older I would like to have the space to keep it all, but that is not an option. So this is what keeps me up or wakes me up.
I have asked my parents to start the process on their own. I don't think it is happening, but in my mind it is. I am heading back East for a few days in April and will have 2 full days to figure out a plan with them. I will be returning in July and hoping that my plan will have been implemented.
I get it, these items are a part of you. Stories, history, and memories. I tear up thinking about it but our cleaning out process and the thought of my next one in years makes me realize how much stuff that takes up our daily lives. I have never felt so free of the crap I had. I have been to Target maybe 5 times since we moved here, I just can't think about shopping and getting more and having to go through another clean out. We still have kitchen and bathroom cabinets that are empty and I don't feel like I have to fill them.
Take a look around your homes and see all the unnecessary stuff you have and items you have no real connection too. I am not saying clean out all your shizz but take a look at what items are most important. I also understand some people enjoy having a magazine picture homes with beautiful things that people oh and ah over and that is great, but I am so over trying to impress. I have all I could want and need and that feeling is way better then a shopping spree at Ikea and Target combine (shocking I know, but the truth)
It has finally taken me 45 years to figure this out and thousands and thousands of wasted dollars.
I am just hoping that my parents can see the benefits of starting now for their financial gain and my mental well being.
Just a website I found that has some great options for aging parents. I will not have to have property to make this happen, but I know my brother and my favorite sister in law have space...
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